Kevin Federline and Ex Nicole Narain

Kevin Federline and Ex Girlfriend Nicole Narain are both getting ready for reality television, but on different D-list shows. Federline started dating Playboy Playmate Nicole Narrain shortly after his break up with Britney Spears, but the affair only lasted a few months. Now, both stars appear to have fallen on very hard times.

Kevin Federline who has gained a few pounds, is preparing for a stint on Celebrity Fit Club. With $20,000 a month in spousal support from Spears, it's hard to imagine that K-Fed is doing the show just for the money. It's a shame. Doing D-list reality shows because you're desperate for the money is much more respectable than doing it just because you want to crawl your way back into the public spotlight at all costs to your pride and dignity.

Meanwhile Ex Girlfriend Nicole Narain, who now describes herself as a sex-addict, will be trying to give up sex for more than twenty days on Dr Drew's new Sex Rehab. Narains is known for appearing in Playboy, appearing half-naked in videos with Diddy and others hip hop stars, and of course making a nasty sex tape with Colin Farrel. The real question for Nicole Narain is not whether or not she can give up her sex addiction, it is whether or not she can walk away from the only thing that ever made her even remotely famous.

Is there any family member Jill Zarin won't pimp out for fame?

I used to be a big fan of Jill Zarin, but the way Jill is pimping out her family members is a bit troubling. It's one thing for her mother to have a bravo blog or to promote her sister's radio show but when you start talking about the younger members of the family it gets troubling.

Am I the only one who remembers what happens when child-tv stars grow up? Does Lindsay Lohan, Todd Bridges, or Danny Bonaduce ring a bell?

Child TV stars have the odds stacked against them to begin with, but when they have mothers who are pimping them out, they really don't have a chance. That's why Jill Zarin promoting her daughter Ally's Personal Blog on her website is so troubling.

Both Ally and Jill are clearly not content to expose just part of their lives on television, so they have decided to share their entire lives online. For a grown adult like Jill Zarin to make this decision is one thing, but when it comes to Ally, I can't help but be concerned.

Ally shows no signs whatsoever of being able to separate her personal life from her public life. Ally posts intimate details about her life, shares private family photos, and shows no understanding of where her public life ends and her private life begins.

Pimping out the details Ally's daily life is playing with fire. This teenager may not realize it yet, but living every moment of your life in the public sphere has it's downsides: just ask Britney Spears. Ally needs to find her worth independent of her tv-personality and discover the parts of her life that are worth keeping private.

Real Housewives of DC: I See White People!

When Bravo Executives launched Real Housewives of Atlanta it was slated to be an all African American cast (note: Lisa Wu Hartwell has both African American and Chinese family members). Fortunately, thanks to some pushing by NeNe Leakes, Kim Zolciak was added to the show at the last minute.

Now Bravo execs are bringing their Housewives franchise to another city with a very large African American population, Washington DC. More than half of the folks who live inside the beltway are African American. But suprisingly, if the rumored list of DC Housewives is accurate, Bravo's Real Housewives of DC does not have a single African American housewife.

Honestly, Bravo could have done much better. There are countless smart and sexy women in the District of Columbia of all races and ethnicities.

Reality Man-Whore: How Real House-Husband Slade Went from Sugar Daddy to Kept Boy

Once upon a time Slade Smiley appeared on Real Housewives of Orange County with then-girlfriend Jo. Slade showed off his big house, his nice car, and his Black Amex Card (oooh ... I hear Madonna has one just like it!).

Then after breaking up with Jo and having a brief affair with another OC Housewife Lauri, Slade attempted to parlay his OC fame into a reality-tv career, pimping out his ex Jo for a tacky reality dating show. Classy guy, eh?

Like many of the housewives, though, Slade proved to be as bad at handling his money as he is at handling his relationships. Slade Smiley, the same guy that bought his girlfriend a Mercedes, apparently couldn't make his mortgage payments. Slade's OC home was foreclosed on and he was kicked out. Slade Smiley's financial situation has gotten so bad, he was recently arrested for failing to make child support payments.

Slade joins a long-list of Housewives cast members who have lost their houses. Real Housewives of Atlanta Nene Leakes, Lisa Wu Hartwell, and Sheree Whitfield, have all been evicted from their lavish homes. We will watch Real Housewives of OC Lynne Curtin get served her eviction notice on season 4 of the show, starting in November. Rumor has it Jeana Keough may not be far behind.

So what does a reality-man-whore like Slade Smiley do when he's flat broke? Why of course, strike up a relationship with Real Housewives of OC cast member Gretchen. Gretchen, after all, is the only OC housewive with a stash of cash. Gretchen is sitting on 2.5 million she inherited from dead fiance Jeff Beitzel. The disturbing part of the story, however, are online allegations that Gretchen and Slade were spending this poor man's money before his body was even cold. Gretchen's ex, Jay Photoglou, claims Gretchen and Slade started dating long before her 'fiance' passed away.

Slade's return should make for an interesting season. Slade has no love lost with OC Housewife Tamra Barney, who in the last episode of Season 3 criticized Slade's wardrobe choice by disparagingly refering to him as a "homo." (Yes, Tamra is that much of a bigot).

A Half-Naked Kim Zolciak? Worst Possible Spokesperson for Marriage Ever

Kim Zolciak is going topless. No, not in an adult magazine, although the stay-at-home mom of two has said she would gladly take it all off for Playboy.

Rather, in one of the all-time greatest examples of reality-tv situational irony, the same woman who will exhibit complete disregard for the institution of marriage on Thursday's episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta, is going topless to advocate for ...... Marriage.

That's right. We knew Kim Zolciak was not exactly a spokesperson for the sanctity of marriage in Season 1, long before NeNe Leakes famously told her in the season finale: "Close your legs to married men!! Close your legs to married men!!."

But Zolciak takes it one step further in this week's episode where she proudly states "I'm not ashamed at all about dating a married man." (of course, defying all logic, she later states she wants a wedding ring from Big Poppa ??).

Which makes you wonder. Why would a woman show exhibits a complete disregard for the institution of marriage want to go topless to advocate for marriage equality in California? Well, I take that back, we all know why Zolciak would want to go topless (to coincide with her release of 'Tardy for the Party' on Itunes this week), but Marriage? Really? Kim Zolciak? Marriage?

Kim Zolciak's disrespect of the institution of Marriage is rapidly turning into disrespect for the gays and lesbians working so hard to achieve marriage equality in the United States. Even Britney and K-Fed would have been a better choice of spokesperson.

Bravo's Latest Housewife: Alexis Bellino

Season 5 of Real Housewives of Orange County is set to air on on November 5th, but you if you're a fan of Jeana Keough, you're going to be disappointed.

My favorite Orange County Housewife is apparently being traded in for yet another younger, svelter, cookie-cutter blonde. Cue the latest housewife Alexis Bellino. Bellino replaces Gretchen Rossie as the hot new skinny blonde. Rossie, you may recall, replaced Tamra Knickerbocker as the hot new skinny blonde. It's the circle of life, OC style.

With Bravo's alleged anorexic Rachel Zoe under fire after she teased her assistant for having normal-sized breasts, and NeNe Leakes from Real Housewives of Atlanta being referred to as a "plus sized model" on a recent episode, you might think Bravo would be paying more attention to body image issues.

But Bravo takes the easier path, opting for yet another blonde Orange County clone. Yes the newest OC housewife Alexis Bellino has three kids, but be it surgery or excercise, no trace of those children remain on her body. And get this, much like Gretchen and Tamra before her, Bravo describes Alexis as "spicy blonde who unabashedly lives life on her terms."

Bravo take note: it's time to mix things up a little. How about a housewife who (shocking!) doesn't have a perfect body? A lesbian housewife? A housewife who actually knows how to cook? The possibilities are endless......

She by Sheree 2010 Spring Collection Includes Knock-Off of Dress Worn in Season One of Real Housewives of Atlanta

Ok I admit that with all the hype and drama I was curious to see the infamous She by Sheree Spring 2010 Collection. Of course nobody expects Sheree to be a fashion designer, but what I did not expect to see was Sheree knocking off her own wardrobe.

In the picture on the left you see the designer dress Sheree Whitfield wore during the filming of Season 1 of Real Housewives of Atlanta; and on the right you see a dress that Sheree "designed" for her collection. The color is the same. The side draping and center pleat? The same. The fabric is the same. The draping is the same. There are only two minor differences, which are the spaghetti strap and the hemline.

And the rest of the collection? Well you can judge for yourself.

Flipping Out: Jeff Lewis Violates State and Federal Employment Laws on Film. Will Former Job Candidates File a Class-Action Lawsuit?

On the most recent episode of Flipping Out, Jeffrey Lewis interviews an employee and commits several infractions of state and federal labor law. If you've ever applied for a job with Jeff Lewis, now may be the time to find a few other people in the same boat and file a class-action lawsuit.

While interviewing his latest employee, Lewis violated at least five state and federal labor laws according to the State Bar of California. Among the infractions:

1. Jeff Lewis asked the job candidate his age. Not allowed.

2. Jeff Lewis asked the job candidate his marital status. Not allowed

3. Jeff Lewis asked the job candidate if he had plans to have children. Not allowed.

4. Jeff Lewis asked the job candidate if he'd ever been arrested. Not allowed. (An employer can legally ask if you have been arrested and are still facing trial on criminal charges for that arrest. And employers can generally ask if you've ever been convicted of a crime. )

Less problematic, Lewis also asked whether or not the candidate could legally work in the United States (the question was phrased in such a way that it would not be allowable). Lewis also asked the candidate what social clubs he belonged to (not allowed).

Of course, Lewis avoided asking any questions about actual job performance. It's pretty clear that Jeff Lewis was trying to have a little fun by intentionally asking every illegal job interview question he could. But will this publicity stunt backfire on him?

After all he's hired an awful lot of cute young guys for all the wrong reasons. His latest intern, for example, was required to send a picture before even getting an interview. And Lewis openly admits to only wanting 'pretty people' working for him.

This may be just the evidence needed by qualified job-candidates who have been turned down by Jeff Lewis. I say sue the man for all he's worth.

Real Housewives, Real Eviction Notices. Is Kim Next?

The Bravo Real Housewives franchise is based on showing the lifestyles of rich & fabulous women, but when it comes to the Real Housewives of Atlanta, these girls are faux-money or just plain no money. And now that "housewife" Kim Zolciak is no longer "entertaining" the married man who was financing her lifestyle, she may be the next one to get an eviction notice.

It all started with Housewife NeNe Leakes. She and her husband were evicted from the Duluth home her husband in September 2008. Husband Greg Leakes owed $6,240 in back taxes.

Next came housewife Sheree Whitfield got her eviction notice in December 2008. Her ex-husband Bob Whitfield had apparently not been making mortgage payments on her Sandy Spring residence, and Sheree, who could normally win awards for her level of self-involvement, was not paying attention to her own finances.

Now Lisa Wu Hartwell, who already had to file for bankruptcy in 2007, has been forced to sell her home after she and her husband defaulted on their loan, TMZ Reports. Hartwell, however, is better off than Sheree and NeNe. She and her husband have a second home they actually OWN they were able to move into.

Forget Prada. Forget Dolce & Gabbana. These women can't even pay their mortgages.

Will Housewive Kim Zolciak be the next evicted housewive? Maybe. Maybe Not. You might think her over-the-top spending sprees, like spending $3,000 on clothes for her daughter, will quickly put this single mom in the poorhouse. But rumor is that Kim's spending sprees are strictly for the camera. Most of the merchandise get's returned the next day. (If there's anything more pathetic than spending $3,000 on kiddie clothes in one hour, it's PRETENDING to spend $3,000 on kiddie clothes in one hour to impress your TV audience).

And of course, Kim Zolciak has been very clear that she's ready, willing, and able to poise for playboy for the right price, so maybe that can make up for the cash she's not longer getting from 'Big Poppa'.

Women & People of Color First to Go on Top Chef

If you've been watching Top Chef Las Vegas, you can't help but notice the obvious. As women and people of color are voted off the show week after week, the contestant pool is increasingly becoming a "good old boy network" much like the top-tier of chefs that serve as guest judges on the show.

But is this intentional or accidental? It all depends on your perspective. A couple of things are clear. A member of the Hindu faith who does not eat or cook beef for religious reasons will never win Top Chef. A member of the Muslim faith who does not eat pork for religious reasons will never win Top Chef. And of course, Vegetarians are completely screwed in this competition.

Women are more likely to be vegetarian. Some people of color don't cook or eat meat for religious reasons. Meat-centric challenges, like this most recent episode focusing on 'classic french proteins', are inherently biased against women and people of color, and one of the reasons Top Chef Las Vegas is rapidly becoming a club for (mostly closeted) white-men only.

These challenges favor contestants who work with meat and are knowledgeable about european cooking techniques and are biased against contestants who may specialize in other ethnic cuisine. When have we seen a Thai Cooking Challenge on Top Chef? An Ethiopian Cooking Challenge?

And selecting a guest-panel of white male judges only makes matters worse.

It seems a particularly cruel joke to recruit a crew of 'Cheftestants' who are diverse in gender, race, and ethnicity, and then set up a series of challenges and select a series of guest judges that stack the odds in favor of the white men.

Top Chef, you can do better!

We Liked Mr. Bravo Before We Found Out He Was a Bitchy Queen

Once upon a time Andy Cohn was King of all things Bravo. We loved Mr. Bravo's winning smile. We loved the way he made well-tailored suits look hip and young again. We loved the grace and skill he separated angry housewives. And yes, he always seemed to ask the right questions, but he did so with a sense of bemused detachment. It made us feel like we were part of an inside joke. Innocent fun. And he never, ever, ever, seemed to take himself too seriously.

But as Andy Bravo has transitioned to his own talk show, all that has changed. He is more like the reality cartoon characters he interviews and less like one of us. Suddenly, he seems to care a little too much about who has a weave and who has had work done. And the fan-questions he used to ask apologetically, hew now embraces enthusiastically.

All this new-found intensity is ... well ... a bit unsettling. We always thought Andy had ... well ... a life! Taking reality TV too seriously robs the experience of it's inherent frivolous fun, and reminds us that being too into reality TV is a bit sad.

To make matters worse, Andy Cohen has a segment on his show where he shares his opinions variety of topics. We never new our sweetly smiling Andy could be such a bitter, nasty, queen. He's ridiculed people with weight issues. He's ridiculed nerds. It's all a bit much to handle. We never new such meanness could be delivered with Andy's signature on-air smile, and now, every time we see his smile, we do so with a bit of suspicion.

Andy seems oblivious to his fact that some of his audience are nerds, are overweight, lack perfect bodies and a New York fashion budget. When Andy attacks these people, he's attacking us.

We've gone from being inside on the joke, to being the brunt of it. It hurts, much like it hurts to watch Cohen fit into this new one-sided reality show persona.

We love you Andy. Please come back to us. Oh, and forget anything Isaac Mizrahi tells you about socks. It doesn't matter how much lotion you put on your feet, not wearing socks is a unsanitary!

Top Chef Forces Contestants into Binary Gender System

Just when you start to think the folks at Bravo really get the gays, they do something to mess it up, like Top Chef Season Six Episode 2.

This episode, where contestants are "forced to compete in teams of men vs. women" was a failure to grasp gender and sexuality studies 101. In a time where everyone from Elizabeth Birch to Caster Semenya are broadening our understanding of gender, Top Chef does the opposite.

Does the top chef contestant pictured on the left identify as male or female? I sure don't know. I've never met Preeti and frankly, it's none of my business.

What I do know, however, is that when you separate the "boys" and the "girls", there are almost always some folks who don't fit neatly into either category, and there are almost always some folks who are hurt in the process. And Preeti sure seemed pretty pissed about the decision for the men to compete against the women.

Top Chef really should have been able to figure this one out on their own.

Alleged Annorexic Rachel Zoe and Sidekick Brad Taylor Taunt Employee for Having Normal Size Breasts

The current episode of the Rachel Zoe project gives us a glimpse at just how messed up Hollywood is when it comes to body image. Wee get to see alleged Annorexic Rachel Zoe and her gay sidekick Brad Taylor taunt Taylor for not being able to fit into a dress because her breasts are too big.

In a normal workplace, teasing an employee about her breast size would be sexual harrasment, not to mention, gosh darn mean. But in Zoe land, apparently not so. Zoe managed to hand over a trite apology without fully understanding what she had said that was inappropriate. Zoe thinks that Taylor must be desperately envious of women with smaller breasts. Really?

Taylor, you are beautiful just the way you are. Rachel is the one who is completely messed up.

But what's really revealing about this incident is what it says about Rachel Zoe's distorted perceptions about body size.

Jill Zarin - Off With Her Head!

A ticket to Jill Zaran's charity event: $250. Her most recent courture gown for the event: $30,000. The purse she will take with her: $16,000. Jill Zarin being challenged about her excessive spending during an economic crisis: Priceless.

Normally Jill Zarin is the housewife we don't hate, but lately, Jill Zarin's relationship with money has become hard to endure. Making the situation worse was Zarin's costume choice for an exclusive Manhattan Halloween Party shown on this week's episode. Jill seemed completely unaware that the idea of a embarassingly rich Manhattan socialitie dressing up as Marie Antoinette in the middle of the greatest economic crisis of our lifetime was the wrong way to go. Marie Antoinette could not relate to the plight of the poor, and it look's like Jill Zarin can't either. Off with her head!

In previous episodes of the Real Housewives of New York City this season, we've watched Jill Zarin drop $16,000 on a single purse, $30,000 on a single dress, and approximately $90,000 on a brand new Mercedes SUV. She's spent more money on the show than most American families would earn in two years time.

In a BBC interview, Jill is asked some hard questions about her privilege and comes up with some embarssing answers. Jill was quick to point out the charity work that she does and the $50,000 she raised at an event for charity.

Let's be honest though, raising that kind of money would be a remarkable achievement for most of us. For Jill Zaran it is the price of one designer gown (she may never wear again) and the $16,000 purse to go with it. Organizing a $250 per person charity event seems a bit hollow when your outfit costs more than the total amount of money you raise. Again, for the average joe, a $250 per person event is a big deal, for a socialite like Jill Zarin though, it's pocket-change.

Note to Zaran: to whom much is given, MUCH is required.

What is truly shocking about this episode however, is the look on Zarin's face when the BBC reporter asks her about her lavish lifestyle in the midst of a financial crisis. Honestly, the expression on her face was one of suprise, almost as if the thought had never, ever, occurred to her before. That was the most disappointing of all.

Note to Countess LuAnn de Lesseps: Celebrity Appearances Don't Count as Community Service

For the second time The Real Housewives of New York City we've been subjected to Countess LuAnn de LeDivorce's alleged (and I stress alleged) community service.

Lulu has a unique approach to cmmunity service. No cooking breakfast at the shelter; no painting walls for a Habitat for Humanity House; no pulling shifts at the Human society. Lulu's approach to community service, you see, doesn't involve any actual work.

Following the spirit of Marie Antoniette, and the French royal line that she can credit for her 'Countess' title, she apparently believes that simply gracing the poor with her presence constitutes community service.

Lulu refers to it as 'mentoring', but to be fair to all the volunteers who actually do mentor, it's important to clarify that mentoring involves imparting an actual skill or ability to the mentee, it's not just an hour long ego pick-me-up session where you gloat to the less fortunate.

Her first 'mentoring' gig involved helping a recovering addict pracice interviewing for an office job, which of course would have been great if she had any meaningful experience with office jobs.

The second attempt at 'mentoring' young girls was about as bad. Note to Lulu, if you need an ego-enhancing hour telling the less fortunate how great your life turned out, so be it. But for god sakes don't call that community service. And consider therapy as an alternative. If youre ego needs that much feeding, chances are you need it.